As noted in the comments on verses 9-17a, the names in verses 17b-23 are place names, not the names of people. The sons of Bethlehem is literally “Sons from Bethlomon.” Then in verses 18-19 The men of is literally “Those from [or, out of].” In verse 20a there is another change, which refers to the Chadiasans and Ammidians. Then in verses 20b-21b The men of (literally “Those from”) is used again. Finally in verses 21c-23 The sons of (literally “Sons of”) occurs. At verse 17b Good News Bible inserts a paragraph break and adds the following sentence to explain that towns are named in verses 17b-23: “People whose ancestors had lived in the following towns also returned.” This addition will be helpful for many languages. Good News Bible does not make any distinction between the town groups introduced by “Sons of/from” and those introduced by “Those from.” There may well be no real distinction. Our model below tries to keep the distinction. We use “people from” to express “Those from,” and “people in groups from” to express “Sons of/from.” (We say “people in groups from” rather than “groups from” in order to make clear that the numbers given refer to numbers of people, not numbers of groups.)
In our model below we do not follow the Greek but Revised Standard Version and Good News Bible for four of the names. We recommend Bethlehem instead of “Bethlohom,” Bethel instead of “Betolio,” Elam instead of “Calamolalus,” and Jericho instead of “Jerechus.” The names Bethlehem, Bethel, Elam, and Jericho are probably familiar enough that confusion would result from using any other form. However, there should be a footnote on The sons of Bethlehem (literally “Sons from Bethlohom”) since the meaning of the Greek text is uncertain. “Sons” is like the preceding list of personal names, but the preposition “from” is like the list of place names that follows. In spite of the spelling “Bethlomon,” we think this is surely a reference to Bethlehem, and that the original text had (as we are translating) “people from Bethlehem” (Bewer, page 23). Elam is named twice, once in verse 12, again in verse 22, where the place is called the other Elam.
The town names and numbers here differ somewhat from those in the parallel lists of Ezra 2.21-35 and Neh 7.26-38. Once again translators should not try to harmonize the variants of names and numbers in this list and those in the lists of Ezra and Nehemiah.
An alternative model for verses 17b-23 is:
• Here are the numbers of the returning lay people whose ancestors had lived in the following towns of Judah:
• people from Bethlehem* – 123
• 18 people from Netophah – 55
• people from Anathoth – 158
• people from Bethasmoth – 42
• 19 people from Kiriatharim – 25
• people from Chephirah and Beeroth – 743
• 20 Chadiasans and Ammidians – 422
• people from Kirama and Geba – 621
• 21 people from Macalon – 122
• people from Bethel – 52
• people in groups from Niphish – 156
• 22 people in groups from Ono and the other Elam – 725
• people in groups from Jericho – 345
• 23 people in groups from Senaah – 3,330
* Probable text people from Bethlehem; Greek Sons from Bethlomon.
Alternatively, “people in groups from” may be rendered “people in the families from.”
Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on 1-2 Esdras. (UBS Helps for Translators). Miami: UBS, 2019. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.