I am very dark, but comely: the adjective given in Revised Standard Version as very dark and in Good News Translation as “dark” is simply the word “black.” In 5.11 the same word describes the color of the raven, a large black bird. The translator will have to choose a term that refers to people and the color of their skin. Some, especially those who think the young woman was a foreign princess, see this term as indicating a person of African origin. In view of verse 6, however, others see it as describing skin darkened by the sun, and this is probably more correct. Our interpretation will affect the way we translate.
Most languages make a distinction between people with a darker complexion and those with fair skin. In many parts of Africa darker-skinned people are described as “black,” while fair-skinned people are described as “red.” In such cultures it is best to use the literal “black.”
The phrase but comely seems to make a contrast between black and comely. Even though she is black, she is nevertheless beautiful. Note, however, that the Hebrew conjunction can be rendered either by but or “and.” Which is intended here?
Those sensitive to and proud of their blackness will almost certainly wish to render the conjunction as “and”: “I am black and beautiful.” However, it is important to note that in many cultures in Africa, Southeast Asia, and the Middle East, being light-skinned is a sign of beauty. Contrary to the Western ideal, being tan or darkened by the sun is viewed in a negative light. This description may mean, for example, that the young woman was forced to work in the sun—a sign of low social status. Indeed, in verse 6 this view in confirmed. She says she is dark “because the sun has scorched me.” In translating faithfully we need to choose terms that accurately reflect the culture of biblical times. In this context but seems to be a more faithful rendering. This is how Good News Translation, New American Bible, New English Bible, New Jerusalem Bible, and others understand it, though Contemporary English Version, New Revised Standard Version, and Revised English Bible use “and.”
The adjective comely appears often in descriptions of the young woman’s physical beauty (see 1.10; 2.14; 4.3; 6.4), mostly with reference to her facial features. Comely therefore means “lovely,” “beautiful.” In cultures that have one particular adjective to describe facial beauty, it will be appropriate here. Of course many languages use verbs in the place of adjectives, but this should pose no problem to the translator.
O daughters of Jerusalem is a phrase that appears in 2.7; 3.5, 10, 11; 5.8, 16; and 8.4. We understand the daughters to be the same group as is identified by the term “maidens” in verse 3 and by “they” in verse 4. As noted in the introduction, opinions vary greatly as to the role this group plays. Some see them as a group of privileged young women—“city girls”—who are light-skinned because they don’t have to work hard in the sun. Some detect a teasing attitude in their speech and so see them as possible rivals of the young woman. We have already noted that they are not actual actors or participants in the poem, but that they function more like a Greek chorus, whose role is to move the drama along. They may also be thought of as imaginary persons to whom the young woman addresses her inner thoughts. This may be rather unnatural in the translation, but we have little choice other than to render the text as it appears. As noted in our introductory remarks, if we explain the function of these “daughters” in the introduction, it will help the reader understand their role in the poem.
Revised Standard Version daughters of Jerusalem translates the Hebrew literally, but we need not use the term daughters if this is not appropriate. We can say “young women,” “girls,” or “women of Jerusalem.” Some languages have suffixes or markers to attach to the word Jerusalem to show they are feminine inhabitants. The call to these women is in the second line of this verse, but there is no reason that it must remain in this position. It may be preferable to place this vocative phrase at the beginning of the verse.
Like the tents of Kedar, like the curtains of Solomon: two questions arise about these parallel comparisons. One has to do with their relationship one with the other; the second is what they refer to and whether they both speak of the same object. We note that Kedar is one of the Ishmaelite tribes associated with Arabia (see Gen 25.13; Isa 21.16-17; Psa 120.5). This tribe typically lived in black tents. Kedar thus refers to the young woman’s black skin. In the case of the curtains of Solomon, this seems to be a reference to the curtains in Solomon’s Temple. The focus is on beauty. Thus each simile applies to one of the two claims the young woman makes about herself. She is as black as the nomads’ tents, and as beautiful as the elaborate curtains of Solomon’s Temple. Pope and Fox suggest we change the name Solomon to “Salmoh,” as there was an ancient tribe by this name in what came to be known later as Edom. Jerusalem Bible, New American Bible, and New English Bible accept this suggestion and so have “Salmoh” or “shalmah” (Revised English Bible) as parallel to Kedar. This appears a neat arrangement, but there is no textual support for the change.
Good News Translation gives translators a good model here by repeating the point of the illustration in each case: “dark as the desert tents of Kedar, but beautiful as the curtains in Solomon’s palace.” To make the point clearer we can repeat the subject pronoun as well: “I am dark like the [black] tents of the tribes in Kedar, and as beautiful as the curtains of Solomon’s Temple.”
Again we note a defensive tone in the young woman’s speech. She may mean “Unlike you, young women of Jerusalem, I am dark,” but this may be overtranslating. If we want to push the point, we can use a contrastive “but”: “I am dark like the tents of the tribes of Kedar, but as beautiful as the curtains….”
The writer of the Song often uses proper nouns or geographical names in the text as a poetic feature. These names may represent exotic or faraway places. Each name carries many associated ideas with it, and certainly they were known and appreciated by the audience that first heard them. However, it may be especially difficult to render these in a poetic context in the translation. In a narrative, for example, we can easily explain, “the ethnic group called Kedar,” but such long explanatory clauses will make our text heavy and lose the beauty of the poetic form. Translators should reflect, then, on how best to render these proper nouns. One way is to transliterate “Kedar” without explanation in the text. A footnote can identify these people and state that their tents are black. Another possibility is to leave out the proper noun and use a noun substitute giving the same idea; for example, “desert-people.” Bible en français courant uses a known word “bedouin.” This may be a good solution, since many readers may have even seen pictures of people today living in black tents.
As noted above, the comparison to the curtains in Solomon’s palace is based on the common feature of beauty. Bible en français courant here translates “like luxurious tapestries [or, cloth].” This translation has the advantage of treating the two lines in the same way, rendering them by a meaningful modern equivalent. In the present case, however, this may not be the best solution—first, because most readers will know Solomon, and second, because the word “Solomon” is a keyword in this poem. It is recommended, then, that in this instance the name Solomon be preserved.
Quoted with permission from Ogden, Graham S. and Zogbo, Lynell. A Handbook on the Book of Song of Songs. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 1998. For this and other handbooks for translators see here .