Then Abraham took Ishmael: Then translates the common Hebrew connective, which here marks the beginning of a new episode. We may also say, for example, “After that.” However, the time reference is given later in the verse as that very day, meaning the same day God finished talking with Abraham. Good News Translation switches this expression to the opening of the verse, and translators should consider doing the same.
Took … and he circumcised is in Hebrew a way of expressing what is really a single event, the act of circumcising. In many languages (including English) it is not necessary to use the first verb (see Good News Translation). In the context of this story, however, a verb such as “brought together” may be required to lead up to the action of circumcising a large number of men all on the one day. In addition the term circumcised without any qualification may mean for readers in some languages that Abraham himself carried out the operation in every case; this is in fact what some translations do say, but it seems rather unlikely in view of the large number of men involved. If this is a problem it may be desirable to say “he gave the order to circumcise them” or “he caused them to be circumcised.” Many translations then continue in the next verses by using an indefinite “they circumcised Abraham and….” See the discussion at verse 10.
The order slaves born in his house and … bought with his money is the same as given in the instructions to Abraham in verses 12 and 13.
Every male among the men of Abraham’s house repeats the instruction from verse 10. Every male … of Abraham’s house means all the males belonging to Abraham’s camp, without exception. Since there is a reference to three hundred and eighteen “trained men” in 14.14, it is likely that all the males numbered more than five hundred.
And he circumcised the flesh of their foreskins: circumcised may need to be shifted to the opening of the verse, and the redundant flesh of their foreskins not repeated. This expression should be handled as in verse 11.
For that very day see above.
As God had said to him: or “as God had instructed him to do.” Translators may find no problem in keeping the clause order of Revised Standard Version, which follows that in Hebrew. However, in some languages an arrangement similar to Good News Translation and others may be clearer. For example, we may begin verse 23 “The very day God left him, Abraham did as God had told him. He circumcised….”
Quoted with permission from Reyburn, William D. and Fry, Euan McG. A Handbook on Genesis. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 1997. For this and other handbooks for translators see here .